Saturday, August 29, 2020

A Little Inspiration for Whomever may need it

 Since I've had this latest relapse; I haven't been able to do much, heck even before that if you want to get technical. Things still haven't gotten more stable. I just felt like leaving a little something up here. For Whomever may need to hear/see it.




Wednesday, August 26, 2020

A 4-Year Old Taught Me How to Live Life by Brett Holcomb | Brett Holcomb...

Pay attention to your children. The things that they do can sometimes apply to your life!


I Feel like I take so many Medications

                                I'm Sorry It took me so long to get this out there. 

                              I've just been going through a lot with these relapses.

         Although I'm sure there are people that take way more! I just feel like I take too many.

  

 This was the original thing I wanted to blog about for the past few weeks or so. My body has been having what's considered a relapses they've been preventing me from doing so. And I was giving yet another medication. Which helped at the time. Yet, at right now I'm not so sure being that there's still other issues going on 😢.

  With that being said I don't take as much medications now but I still take enough. Which is why I’m not taking as many now( no vitamins😕).

 Now I take 5 sometimes 6 (if I’m in pain)prescribed medications(pills) and two different prescribed eye drops )in the morning. As well as 2 allergy pills. In the afternoon I take 3 prescribed pills. In the evening I take 5 prescribed pills. Three days out of 7 I have to give myself a needle(I really hate this part).

And I was taking vitamins on top of it. Yet, I ran out of them since I originally started this. So, it doesn't seem like as much now. If you all have been keeping up;you know the only income I have at the moment is saga, which is literally only $219 a month, I can barely afford to survive as it is. 

  I was only able to get the vitamins when I got my stimulus check. And I didn't purchase enough to last a long period of time. 

 If I had the vitamins in the mornings it would be two more. Being that I’ve ran out I haven’t been taking them. There's also another 2 maybe 3 that I didn’t even lost; being that they’re as needed. One I may take more than the others.

 I didn't  go into the names of all of them and the dosages. Being that I'd probably be here all day. Trying to explain them all , and what they are for.

 I'm sure it sounds like I'm complaining. It just tends to get overwhelming at times. I just had to get that off of my chest.

Yes, it took me forever to get this out. Blame the relapses 😂.

Do you take a lot of medications? Or not a lot at all?What are you thoughts on this? 

If you have any questions don't hesitate to ask in the comment section. And Please don't forget to follow and share this blog! It would be greatly appreciated.


Friday, August 21, 2020

Re-edited/Reminders

I hate being reminded of things. Recently I've lost primary custody of my youngest son, due to the issue I have going on, like me being hospitalized, losing my job, and awaiting a response from social security.
I'm really hurt about his father being greedy for money and taking me back to court. Especially being that he's made it seem as though our child was in danger, when he went to school every day, doctors appointments were scheduled an attended, he had new/clean clothes on every day. Yes, that was without me having an income or a car.
I can admit us living house to house was not ideal. But he was in no way shape or form in any type of harm. I love all of my children with everything in me. And most times I would go without to make sure they had. He knew that.
Although it did nott matter to him because his only concern was to get assistance from the state of Connecticut. What kind of man actually makes it his business to try and defraud the state when he actually works? And makes really good money doing so. Yes, this has been reported several times to several different departments. The response was they couldn't do anything because he had his own business and couldn't really track his income (interesting, right?
With all of this going on I chose to sit back and ponder my thoughts, rather than open up and speak about them. Being that its easier for me to deal with them that way. Yes, it bothers me that I only see him every other weekend. And that when I do have him, we have to walk on pins and needles (don't want to get into that part), just to not ruffle any feathers.
It's just so much easier for me to handle it that way. When it's brought up, I'm brought to tears. I've cried more than enough tears and would rather avoid them. I hope everyone could understand that!
I'm not trying to be harsh or trying to stop you from feeling a certain way about how I should feel. But me crying and lashing out isn't going to get me far at all. It all stalls the process I have to take a bit more. Stops me from taking the time to send emails to get help, applying for programs that'll help us, or even writing to attempt to try and make some type of living.
Trying to find a job with no experience and really messed up heath issue just isn't working for me. The reminders of things I could be doing would be doing, and right now just can't do is hurting my situation more. It's not you it really is me. I forgive you for bringing it up. I just hope you can do the same for me. Even if you don't understand or care. Just please take a moment and try to keep that in mind.
I just rather not be reminded.
Please take a moment to share this if you've read it. And maybe even comment and follow if you like. I'm trying to get better at this. Thanks, have a good day!

Re-edit /Surviving Multiple Sclerosis with Mzlittlejohn

How can people expect for you to open up to them about your feelings? When you speak to most people about them, they just start telling you about theirs, or what you should be doing. Most times it’s after you’ve exhausted almost all of your options. What I've been doing lately is writing about them.
If people take the time out to read my writings, they’d understand them better. With the things I have been going through ;although I feel it’s embarrassing, and people are looking at me differently ;this just works better.
I am at the point in my life where I can care less about how people feel. It's initially not for them, it's for me. And it actually helps me get it out. No interruptions, or hearing other peoples thoughts, or what they would do. 
I have to deal with the people telling me no. I have to deal with being sent to different programs. I have to deal with my children no longer having stability ;as well as not having an income, staying with other people, and not knowing if tomorrow will be the day that I’m told I have to leave.
Or having a conversation and seeing something that triggers my tears. Yes, I have those days. Days that I’d just rather be alone with my thoughts. Of Course there is some when I don’t need to be alone.
A lot of times that is my only option. Because right now I am not at liberty to have that option.
One day I’ll get back to not having to result to this. And maybe have conversations with someone who understands.
As of right now, it cannot be done. Especially if when have moments where I have to bite my tongue. Or end up with the conversation being about them or someone else and not me.
As of right now, the conversation's about my feelings. Lets just stick to it being written, typed, and maybe in one of my latest YouTube videos. Heck at the moment, it’s here. And will probably end up back here again.
Because trying to obtain followers on my YouTube page at the moment isn’t getting far. I’m not funny, refuse to do crazy stuff, and just have not quite found my niche with that.
At the moment, there aren't that many videos on there. Currently I’m at a stand still when it comes to what I’d like to talk about. The video I posted before the last was on trying to obtain voice over work. Can you believe they want you to pay upfront to find work? I mean if I had money, I wouldn't t be trying to pay them for work.
I wonder if I pay them, does it guarantee me jobs? Or leads or whatever they consider it? I’m afraid it’ll be a waste of time anyway.
I am not in no way saying that I am no longer interested. In fact I’m still trying to get around having to pay. I’m broke, can you blame me?
If you've gotten this far thank you. I’d say thanks for reading  this far. You're reading this piece written be me. And it is much appreciated. Since this seems to be the best way for me to get my feelings out; there will be more eventually. How often? That is what I’m not to sure about.
Check out my my YouTube page as. The links should be available here( on the left of the web version of this site. 
Please don't hesitate to comment. And follow this blog (again on the left of the web version of this page).